life as we know it

Well life is coming along. Slow yet lighting fast at the same time. hurry up and wait! the story of my live. It seems like everything is hurry up do this, yet wait we can't fit you in yet. i think i've gotten my life together and ready to go to Seattle for Wyatt's surgery. Work is driving me crazy. My coworkers are lazy slobs. They just wanna come to work sit on their asses and get paid. but never actually do anything. we are getting inspected by the fed tomorrow to renew our grant. you know our whole running budget. And they could care less. I have been busting my butt to get all the to do lists done. My bosses love me and thank me everyday for everything i've been doing. I have been asked to come back for the next program. They say they are very happy to have somebody there that actually wants to work and want me to know they appreciate it. It really helps at these trying times. I feel so ready to quit and walk away most day. But knowing that the boss people appreciate me and want me to stick around. 3 more weeks of this is all i have to do. 3 more weeks of the idiots. and the idiots will not be asked to return next program. I can take solice in that fact. hmmmm so tired so tired. must rest now. No rest for the wicked.

life today

I completely forgot about this blog. not that anybody reads it. I have been super busy. I've been working. YAYEE for that! but wyatt has gotten worse now. I am struggling to keep up with his needs and work and not forget his sisters all at the same time. We have now decided he will be getting a g-tube. I feel horribly guilty about this, but it will help him qualify him for the extra help i need to be able to care for him. ATM he's stuck in the middle ground where he's not disabled enough to get extra help from any programs, but to much extra work for regular daycares to care for him. I wish i could just stay home with him. He does so much better that way. BUT someone has to make money to pay the bills since his father isn't paying childsupport anymore. Monday the 13th we go for the surgical consultation. Not sure where i'm at with all this. I've compartmentalized atm and will be dealing with later. I don't have anytime to work through my emotions right now. All i know is i am doing what is best for my son and that is all that matters.

What to do today?

Today is the dreaded day. Tomorrow my girls come home so today that is all i can think about. So what to do today to keep myself busy? i can stay home set up the new slip and slide Buddy Ray got the girls for their wonderful grades. But i kind of think it should be saved for them to use first. We could go down to the river and play on the beach, but then that would mean i would have to get in the whole time and get all sandy because it would be just me playing with wyatt and not have his sissy's to help me now and then. I guess i could just stay home and finish cleaning the house and set up his mini pool and let wyatt play outside in that. Then i could maybe do some crocheting.

well that settles it. I am gonna stay home, do some cleaning and let wyatt play outside in his pool and the sprinkler. thank goddness for central air :D

stupid men

I am so fed up with my stupid ex-douchebag! So now he informs me that he is not going to pay the second half of his child support for this month. He knows that without it i can not pay all my bills. He knows that i went on vacation earlier this month because i was expecting this check giving me the ability to pay my bills. But no AFTER i get back from camping he tells me he is NOT gonna pay it. So whatthef@ck am i suppost to do about paying my rent? Why is it that he gets to take the kids to do all the fun stuff while i have to sit here doing nothing with them because hes to selfish to pay his childsupport? GAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! I so wish sometimes that visitations were dependent upon paying your child support. He would pay it then. He loves spending time with them, he just doesn't want to pay for them.

Is this somekind of revenge because i won't let wyatt go over there for more than 1-2 hours at a time 1-2 times a week? I HATE STUPID SELFISH PEOPLE! It has nothing to do with my distain for that man! it has everything to do with me trying to do everything within my power to help my son grow and thrive. If that means not spending extended time alone with his dad and stepmom then so be it. Its about what is best for OUR son not whats best for him. BLEH! stupid people should be shot! ok maybe not. I use to say leave him alive i need the child support but he isn't paying it anymore so why leave him alive and in workable condition?

*Blah*

I am not really sure what i have to say today. Not much yet lots have been happening. My life seems to run at 500 mph yet i have nothing to do. The girls are in swim lessons everyday. they started off rough, but we did family free swim time yesterday so I could help them practice. It seemed to help them relax in the water and have more confidence. Today they did really good. Bella swam all the way across the pool (short way) all by herself with no help from the instructor. KK actually did both hand and kicks today. Instead of just one. OH and she let go of the instructor. I am so proud of her. She even went all the way to the deepest part instead of staying on the edge of the shallow end. Wyatt has his next lesson tonight. Not that they are really lessons. I just hold him and we sing songs and he splashes thats about it.

well i guess thats all the news i have for today. type to you all later. If there is a "you" reading this.

life today

Life today is fun. My girlies started swimming lessons. Issy did better than i expected. KK was right where i thought she was. I am so bored with them at their dads house for the week though. I hate it when they go there. Wyatt wants my attention 24/7 i can't get anything done. He pretty much ignores his toys unless i am on the floor playing with him. But Uncle Jamie found a cool sesame street playhouse at Target yesterday that has wyatt entertained temporarily.

I think hes is doing better on his weight btw. He has found the peanut butter love. His OT/PT suggested offering lots of peanut butter instead of adding olive oil to his diet to help add calories. I think its a success. He scrapes all the peanut butter off the bread and eats it up. I think tomorrow for snack time i'm gonna offer him a spoon full of peanut butter and see how he does. Also hes getting some nice thighs on him finally. Upper arms too i think. I am hoping to see a nice weight gain at his next appt. I am interested to see how his OT/PT has to say about her plans for feeding therapy. I have no idea what to expect.

Wish me luck all you out there. I am hoping to hear back about a job tomorrow or the next day. I hope i get it. It seems like a really great opportunity. I would love to get back into daycare work. I need to catch up on my training, but am trying to not let that hold me back. Now its time to get off here and play with the wee one again. He is calling me again.

June 13, 2010

Hi all! My name is Becky. I am a single mother to 3 wonderful children. They are the love of my life. I am currently not working, but hope to remedy that problem soon. My oldest child is 7yrs old her name is Issabella, but she prefers to be called Issy Mae or Monkey Butt. Daughter number 2 just turned 6yrs old. Her name is Katie, but she prefers K-K or Buggio. My youngest child is my wonderful son. He is 17 months old, his name is Fredrick. But that is also his dads name so to help with confusion we call him by his middle name Wyatt, although he will answer to "Minion" as well :D lol. There is much i could say about them. They are what moves my life. Without them I am lost. Everything i do, i do for them. Maybe at a later date i will write more about them. Letting you all a chance to get to know them and see why i am madly in love with all of them.